Saturday, July 24, 2010

At the End of the Line

You know the kid in school who was nice but kinda shy and never had many friends? The kid who would hang back and let the others push their way onto the bus for a field trip so they'd be sure to sit with their friends and then get stuck sitting with the teacher? The kid who, when he grew up a little, always thought it would pay off in the end to do the extra work instead of doing just enough to get by? Well I have news for that kid. Life doesn't work that way. There is no reward for staying out of the limelight and toiling away in hopes that someday you'll be recognized for all your hard work. And those kids who pushed their way ahead of you all those years? They're still ahead of you and always will be. They'll be better off financially, more secure emotionally, and in control of exactly what they want to get out of life. They will come to own you.
My advice...decide early on in life if you want to be first in line or last. Push your way to the front of the popularity crowd if that's what you desire. However, if you don't want to be part of the "in" crowd then you'd better have a concrete plan for your life, something you're going to stick to and follow to the end. Life is not fair, and when you start to think it is then you'd better be ready for a hard fall.

In case you haven't guessed, this has not been a very good week.

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Just Plain Weird

My memory was jarred the other day when my wife was talking about something, and I couldn't quite picture the images in my head but they were very familiar, of a place I'd been to. I kept trying to think of where that place was and when it was that I went there. It took a long time to put the pieces together and when I did I realized that I was remembering a dream I had, who knows how long ago.
I'm starting to creep myself out.

Friday, July 09, 2010

Lebron who?

Monday, July 05, 2010

Fast-Moving Summer Blues... or Something Like That

I guess I should write something here so that when I look back and see a long absence between posts I won't wonder if I was in a coma and just plain forgot about it. So, to the me of the future, and any readers who might have passed this way and noticed a lack of activity, I'm still alive.
This has been a busy and fast-moving summer. I can't believe it's July already. There have been major changes at my work and I don't know if I'll be there much longer. New management was brought in and there is a lot of anxiety among the workforce regarding changes that have been made and the many more that are certain to come. I just wish they would ax me quickly if that's their plan, so that maybe I could salvage a little bit of the summer and get things done that I wanted. But no one knows what will happen and that's frustrating.
I've been in a depression of sorts for a while, although keeping busy with all the chores that I have to do helps keep my focus on things other than my emotional state. I had a birthday last week, which only added to my downtrodden mood. After a bit of a positive change earlier this year it looks like I'm starting to slide back to my old, panic-ridden self. No, check that... the panic hasn't been consuming me like it had in the past, but I guess it's just a feeling of despair because it looks like I'll live the remainder of my life never having really taken control of it.
Ok, enough gloom...
My son and his wife just bought a house and they're really excited about moving out of her parents' house - even though their new home is directly across the street from them. Jonathan, my grandson,is growing up way too fast. He keeps asking to come and see me because I've become his favorite playmate. I love to get down on the floor and chase him and play ball with him and all those things that I did with his daddy, although I run out of energy a lot faster now than I did back then. It's really been a blessing to be able to spend all this time with him now after not seeing him much at all in his first year and a half of life. He makes me forget about all those other things that worry me when I see such youthful energy and happiness.

I suppose I should try to come back here more often so I can keep the future me up on all the details of what happened way back when, but I can't make any promises. Even though the days are long now it seems I have no time to sit and write anything on here which would be of any interest to anyone. So, I'll pop in and say a few words when time allows. Until next time, I hope everyone in the northern hemisphere is having a wonderful summer.