The wedding was someplace I haven't been in thirty years even though it isn't that far away, so I was anxious about going there and wondering if I'd have a panic attack and run out of the church. Surprisingly, I pushed myself in the two weeks before the wedding until I finally made it there, then kept driving back several times to get used to it, so that on the wedding day I made it through without panicking once. A minor victory of sorts, and hopefully the start of me retaking control of my life - or rather more accurately, letting go of trying to control my own life and letting things fall as they may.
My wife cried a little at the ceremony and I almost did then too, but my emotional moment came at the reception when Nathan, my wife and I were alone on the dance floor - the first time all day we'd been alone with him. My wife gave him a hug, then I embraced him and realized it had been years since I'd done so. We held each other tightly for a long time and the tears flowed and the lump in my throat was so big I couldn't talk to tell him that I loved him or that I was so proud of him... but I think he knew.
It was also a great weekend because I got to see my grandson a lot in that time. I played with him during most of the decorating time at the reception hall the day before the wedding and a lot during the reception. It's wonderful because he now knows who my wife and I are, since they've also been bringing him to the house more. I'm "Papa" to him...and I'm perfectly fine with that.
Will post some pictures from the wedding soon but don't worry, I won't put too many of me on here... wouldn't want to scare everyone away.