Monday, October 18, 2010

Still Waiting For the Scare

Pay no attention to that fool at the messy desk.
I used to have a full-grown beard when I first met my wife, some 29 years ago. Since then I've had jobs that required me to be clean-shaven (mustache allowed only). Now that I have no such restrictions I thought it might be interesting top see if I could still grow a beard, or if all those years of shaving had trained my face to sprout about a 1/8" growth then stop. But, after four weeks, it looks like I remembered how to add some winter insulation (and cover up that second chin that's appeared from nowhere). I'm surprised it came in as dark as it did, considering that the hair on my head is an ever-increasing shade of gray (my facial hair must not have gotten the memo since that department has been only recently reactivated).
Anyhow, we spent the night at the cabin Saturday and had a good time. I hadn't seen my grandson in a couple of weeks, and when he came he dragged me into the cabin to play with him - sitting outside by the fire just wasn't his thing when he had toys in the cabin. As usual, he made me get my achy bones on the floor and play, but I wasn't complaining one bit.

After everyone else went home we watched spooky movies until we fell asleep. It is just me, or are most of the really good horror movies the ones from years past? The three we watched were predictable and pretty boring. It seems most of today's movies concentrate on showing a lot of blood instead of trying to provide you with that suspenseful scare. Blood doesn't frighten me, or nauseate me, so those films are - for the most part- boring. But I saw that Friday the Thirteenth movies are on starting tonight, so I'll catch some of those. At least the first few of those were sufficiently scary.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Anticipation in Mid October

The leaves are changing color and falling. The night air is cool. Pumpkins and goblins are appearing all over the place. It's getting close to Halloween. I love this time of year and know that a lot of people will be posting Halloween stories, which I really enjoy reading. I'm thinking of putting one on here if I can get my brain fired up. If you run across any good sites with scary stories please let me know, I love a good fright!

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

The Unblemished Melon

A person's brain has many indentations, and they say the more of these there are on the surface of the brain the more intelligent you are. Einstein, they say, had many deep indentations on his. In fact, I think they kept his brain in a jar for many years after he died and tapped into his intellect through wires attached from his brain to super computers, which gave us great advancements in things like the Star Wars defense program, Internet porn, and Billy Mays infomercials. Truly a genius.
After much study, many mathematical computations, hospital examinations & x-rays I've found that my own brain, like Einstein's, is quite extraordinary. It has the surface of a freshly polished bowling ball. Information making its way to my cerebral cortex is usually deflected the way most southerners casually shoo away a bothersome fly. This has never been so apparent as is has lately, like when trying to ascertain the slope of a demand curve with several variables, and my mind automatically turns on the 80's music and goes to a happy place. It's hard to drag it back from there. There are pretty, soft, warm things in that happy place, and they permeate the outer tissue of my shiny orb so much more readily than those facts and figures that I really need to get in there. I considered getting a brain transplant, but then I read, in the same magazine that had all that stuff about Albert's brain, that you could get hooked up directly to the wires from that jar and get instant intelligence. But it costs like $20,000 to do that, so instead I sent away for a CD that has the same stuff on it for $399 + shipping. It says that it subconsciously feeds information to my brain, all the while playing my favorite 80's songs.